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On Drugs
People have been having casual sex since the dawn of humanity. As of 2003, however, the term casual sex or hookup has come to refer to relations that do not comply with the generally accepted legal guidelines for sexual activity within mainstream culture. Having casual sex can be frowned upon or even viewed as being in violation of particular religious or moral beliefs.[1] Ethical issues surrounding casual sex is found in the 1960 United States’ Supreme Court decision Roe v. Wade.[2]
Evidence of sex outside of the context of a committed, exclusive relationship is found among men and women of all ages, social classes, and religions.[3] According to Amnesty International, up to 70% of schoolgirls in the Democratic Republic of Congo may be sexually assaulted.[4] In turn, the United Nations has highlighted the failure of the Catholic Church and some Protestant denominations to address the problem in its member states.[5]
Please note that this article has an element of sensationalism. It is not meant to diminish the experience of casual sex. Instead, it aims to examine the trend and place the “hookup culture” in a historical perspective.
Has casual sex gotten worse?
There is evidence to suggest that the available levels of casual sex have increased, particularly in the last decade, due in part to the overall societal increase in, and perceived acceptance of, casual sex. As many studies have shown, casual sex is negatively associated with rape and sexual assault. Moreover, those who engage in casual sex tend to demonstrate higher levels of virginity, which is thought to be the best protection against victimization.[6]
Some have speculated that the prevalence of casual sex is rooted in the relative increase of poverty and unemployment, as the tools with which to find sexual partners (internet dating and apps) increase. However, while the unemployment rate has increased since 2008, the overall rate of unemployment decreased in the same time period.[7]
On Work
The US federal minimum wage has remained at $7.25 for many years, but due to an increase in the Consumer Price Index the current federal rate increases yearly to $7.83 as of September 2014.[8] As of 2011, the average US household had a budget deficit of $5,040 for the year, of which 20% of the burden was due to “rent” and “utilities”, 11% for “food”, 6% for “medical care”, 6% for “transportation” and 5% for “household supplies”, making it the most significant consumer-level expense
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Despite the recent explosion in the popularity of hookup apps, one thing hasn’t changed: Casual sex still can, and does, cause problems. “People don’t think about the emotional issues that often come with casual hookups,” says Dr. Dobson. “Even if these have a great sex life, being casual about a sexual encounter puts pressure on these couples to either always be having a great sex life or to lead an uncomplicated, sometimes celibate, life. They can’t have it both ways.”
That’s not to say that people can’t have mind-blowing, steamy sex with someone they’ve just met on an app, but it’s just not necessarily super healthy, says Dobson. “And if they don’t have a positive emotional experience and can’t communicate clearly with one another in the morning, problems can occur,” he adds. “Of course, this is not an excuse to be a hermit for the first 20 years of your life, nor is it to believe you have a license to ask any sex partner any personal questions you want, or to be able to use the occasion to sleep around like you would at a party. Such things are not okay, nor is casual sex a valid substitute for love in marriage.”
Whether you’re a daily hookup fiend or the occasional casual one, here are some issues that should be on your radar if you’re having casual sex.
Many of these risk factors are similar to those you would see in a seriously problematic relationship, says Dr. Dobson. “Generally, you are far more susceptible to someone who plays mind games with you; who is unwilling to be honest; who lies; who has hidden information about past relationships, who is thoughtless, manipulative, secretive, secretive, or has this weird need to always ‘experiment’ with your sexual behavior, who doesn’t respect your boundaries.”
But there are some definite points of difference, too. “Having casual sex removes the obstacle of having to be romantic, or getting or keeping a committed relationship. Not having that criteria to achieve positive self-esteem or feeling good about yourself takes it out of the equation. And because casual sex generally is behind closed doors, you are less likely to be witnessed or to have the comfort of someone being your roommate, mutual friend, or some other common ground.”
As a dad, being up on these issues can help you spot any potentially harmful things about a sexual partner before it’s too late. You might also note how their habits have been
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